How did they jack up the movie/comic interaction this bad?

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 9:41 am

Imagine what a great surprise it was for people who come off of watching the Iron Man movie to read Civil War and find out what an incredibly neo-nazi dick the character is in the comics.

Imagine how fun it is for people to come off of watching the Spiderman movies and see Spiderman ask the devil to abort his unborn baby.

Imagine how fucking awesome it is when people who watch the Dark Knight pick up a damn Batman comic book only to find out that not only is Bruce Wayne dead but he also died violating his principles!

Bullshit. How do these guys fuck it up so badly? How can they do that to new readers? Who is in charge of this crap? I oughta punch them in the dick.

Koumei · Post by **Koumei** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 11:19 am

Lago PARANOIA wrote:Spiderman ask the devil to abort his unborn baby.

Wait, what?

not only is Bruce Wayne dead but he also died violating his principles.

Again... what? Really, I must know!

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 11:45 am

Koumei wrote: Wait, what?

Brief summary of One More Day:

Aunt May is dying from a bullet and Spider-Man goes through nearly all of his connections (Iron Man, Dr. Strange, so on) to try to find a way to save her life but nothing doing.

So Mephisto, Marvel universe's equivalent of Satan, comes up to Spider-Man and flat-out tells him that he will save Spider-Man's life in exchange for his marriage. Nearly all of his relationship and memory of it with Mary Jane is retconned out of existence (including their yet-to-be-born kid) and... Spider-Man ACTUALLY GOES THROUGH WITH THE DEAL.

Again... what? Really, I must know!

I don't have the details yet on it, but apparently Batman just died in Batman: RIP, some dumbass comic Grant Morrison drew.

Unlike One More Day, I haven't gotten over how retarded this plot point is yet so I'm not ready to investigate it. Do it yourself, I kind of want to die now.

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 12:16 pm

I mean, seriously, what the hell is wrong with comic books nowadays? The Runaways can't rescue the life of their old friend, Booster Gold can't prevent Barbara Gordon from being permanently crippled, but what we can do is end up killing off Captain America and Batman for real.

Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH COMICS NOWADAYS?! What in the name of fuck is their problem? WHY do comics have to be so depressing? WHY do the heroes always have to fail in the long run? Why do comics insist on putting their characters through all this hateful and pointless suffering and give the people putting their lives, happiness, and sanity on the line so much fucking grief?

I hate this shit so very much! I can't stand this stupid horseshit any longer. Fuck you American comics. I hate you and I hate the message you're sending out. I mean, the Dark Age was bad... but it was never THIS bad. At least Spider-Man still had a woman he loved to go home to and at least Captain America and Iron Man...

I can't fucking stand it. I've drank too much cider and tequila and I'm going to lie down. And no, I didn't drink because Batman died a bitter failure. Or maybe I did. Shut up. Don't judge me.

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 12:18 pm

Fuck Modern Age. I hated the Dark Age for exactly this reason, but at least in the Dark Age the heroes weren't ineffectual and pathetic. I mean, they were pathetic but at least they didn't fail at extremely fucking basic things like protecting their loved ones or living up to their 'don't kill' principle.

Surgo · Post by **Surgo** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 5:22 pm

Bad writing. Really bad writing. And often an effect of having multiple writers on the same character and the character just living for too damn long. I don't read comic books, but if you keep the same character around forever and ever and ever they're going to start a downward spiral of dumbness because all the cool story ideas got used up long since.

The movies listed (save Spiderman 3 which sucked) all distilled down ages of good and bad stories into a single believable and good storyline. Even though I really liked those movies (and Marvel vs Capcom 2), there's no way I'd ever pick up the comic books.

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Sat Jan 31, 2009 5:38 pm

Basically, comics are a lot like fanfic. The mythic character is whatever he is, but the story being told today is just whatever story is told today.

For every Evangelion Re Take or Angelic Days there's like fifty thousand kajillion stories about Shinji getting killed or having sex with Touji. That's just how the folk process works. It takes like a generation and some hindsight to figure out which of those story lines was worth anything.

Lots of people write up story line where Shinji eventually puts his dick into Asuka, but having it done believably and well is what gets it ultimately accepted as canon.

Let's face it: I totally buy Scott Summers getting over his Gene Grey affliction and living happily ever after with the White Queen. Why? Because there was a whole thing where that was written by Joss Whedon, and it totally worked. As far as I'm concerned, that's canon now.

-Username17

Prak · Post by **Prak** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 12:59 am

Lago PARANOIA wrote:I mean, seriously, what the hell is wrong with comic books nowadays? The Runaways can't rescue the life of their old friend, Booster Gold can't prevent Barbara Gordon from being permanently crippled, but what we can do is end up killing off Captain America and Batman for real.

I don't think Booster could have actually prevented her from being crippled... I think he can only make sure he does what he supposedly did.
(fucking time travel)

Seriously, WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH COMICS NOWADAYS?! What in the name of fuck is their problem? WHY do comics have to be so depressing? WHY do the heroes always have to fail in the long run? Why do comics insist on putting their characters through all this hateful and pointless suffering and give the people putting their lives, happiness, and sanity on the line so much fucking grief?

Because it's not the Silver age anymore. It's now, supposedly, the diamond age (or electrum age, if you like), but apparently the writers want to go with the Iron Age. It's looking like, in a lot of comics, it's the world of darkness.

I can't fucking stand it. I've drank too much cider and tequila and I'm going to lie down. And no, I didn't drink because Batman died a bitter failure. Or maybe I did. Shut up. Don't judge me.

Y'know, given the list of reasons to drink... the bitter failing of a childhood hero who stood for justice and wouldn't kill is actually probably one of the better ones.

Sir Neil · Post by **Sir Neil** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 2:42 am

Prak_Anima wrote:It's now, supposedly, the diamond age...

Rather, the "cubic zirconia" age.

Lago wrote:I can't fucking stand it. I've drank too much cider and tequila and I'm going to lie down. And no, I didn't drink because Batman died a bitter failure. Or maybe I did. Shut up. Don't judge me.

Like Prak said, it's a better reason than most.

Absentminded_Wizard · Post by **Absentminded_Wizard** » Sun Feb 01, 2009 7:51 am

I suspect the trend has something to do with pressure to sell issues. It's the same thing that makes both major companies have to have some Earth-shaking mass-crossover event every year.

ckafrica · Post by **ckafrica** » Mon Feb 02, 2009 6:43 am

Well if regular cannon has got you down, just pick up Preacher. It redeems my faith in humanity.

Crissa · Post by **Crissa** » Mon Feb 02, 2009 6:37 pm

Barbara Gordon gets crippled. Dude, it's part of the storyline. Without it, there's no Oracle. That Booster Gold is involved this time around is what's weird. Like, WTF, man?

-Crissa

Username17 · Post by **Username17** » Mon Feb 02, 2009 6:48 pm

Crissa wrote:Barbara Gordon gets crippled. Dude, it's part of the storyline.

No. It's a shitty part of the storyline that happened when we let Alan Moore rub his penis all over the Batman franchise. He writes a good story, but he insists on making characters die, get crippled, and perform character destroying actions. Top Ten was a good story, but how insulting would it have been if he'd actually been allowed to turn the entire Justice League into a pedophile ring? The Watchmen was epic, but it would have been tragedy if he was literally allowed to have Captain Atom beat The Question to death in the snow after Judo Master had just used a psionic bomb to cause mass deaths in New York?

Seriously, fuck him. Killing Joke was an OK story, but like everything else that Alan Moore ever writes it's totally fucked when it comes to writing more stories. Pretending that that shit has to stay canon forever is fucking retarded.

-Username17

Lago PARANOIA · Post by **Lago PARANOIA** » Mon Feb 02, 2009 7:15 pm

Crissa wrote:Barbara Gordon gets crippled. Dude, it's part of the storyline. Without it, there's no Oracle. That Booster Gold is involved this time around is what's weird. Like, WTF, man?

-Crissa

Batman got crippled, too. How come he gets to come back and fucking Batgirl doesn't get to?

I don't know why the status quo in comics almost always has to change for the worse. We got a new Batman, at the cost of Bruce Wayne getting crippled. Bruce Wayne comes back as Batman, at the cost of Azrael losing his sanity and prestige.

I enjoyed Identity Crisis on the whole, but why did Loring and Dibny have to go out that way? Why did Tim Drake's die have to die? Why did the mantle Captain Boomerang have to get stronger?

Neeeek · Post by **Neeeek** » Mon Feb 02, 2009 8:07 pm

Lago PARANOIA wrote:
Crissa wrote:Barbara Gordon gets crippled. Dude, it's part of the storyline. Without it, there's no Oracle. That Booster Gold is involved this time around is what's weird. Like, WTF, man?

-Crissa
Batman got crippled, too. How come he gets to come back and fucking Batgirl doesn't get to?

Probably because Oracle is a much more unique and interesting character than inherently derivative Batgirl, while Batman is the fucking franchise.

Count Arioch the 28th · Tue Feb 03, 2009 3:02 am

Plus, Batgirl was invented so people wouldn't assume Robin was gay. I'm not making that up.

angelfromanotherpin · Post by **angelfromanotherpin** » Tue Feb 03, 2009 3:26 am

Count_Arioch_the_28th wrote:Plus, Batgirl was invented so people wouldn't assume Robin was gay. I'm not making that up.

So, just like Maid Marian and Little John? Makes sense to me.

Count Arioch the 28th · Tue Feb 03, 2009 4:33 am

Yeah, Batgirl and Batwoman were both invented because some guy wrote a book about how bad comic books were, and said that Batman and Robin were gay. So they gave them both bat-girlfriends to prove they were all man.

The Gaming Den

How did they jack up the movie/comic interaction this bad?

How did they jack up the movie/comic interaction this bad?

Re: How do they jack up the movie/comic interaction this bad

Re: How do they jack up the movie/comic interaction this bad